The sixth time I heard from the Lord in a clear and distinct way was when I was a little over 3 years into my recovery. I had started my new job in the fall of 2008 and I did not know if it was going to pan out. I took a risk leaving the car sales industry but I am sure God caused the 2008 Recession just to move me out of car sales and into the job I presently hold. (Typical thinking for a Narcissist…it is all about ME.)
So every morning I am driving to Chillicothe (a small two one hour south of Columbus) and everyday it is a battle. The fearful side of me is saying … “You are an idiot leaving your job to work for a guy in a new business. This is all going to fail and down the financial drain you and your family will go.
So I decided to turn on the radio and listen to James MacDonald from 7:30 – 8:00. James was preaching on Psalm 23. So to help calm my fears I began praying through the 23rd Psalm. Reminding myself that God is my Shepherd. He promises me … “I shall not want.” He will provide for my needs and not leaving me “wanting”. He would cause me to lay down in green pastures and would lead me beside the still waters.
Then I heard Him say to me …
“John … I am going to Restore Your Soul.”
Oh how my soul needed to be restored. After 8 years of sexual sin and brokenness and three plus years of struggling in the desert of Recovery … how I longed for my soul to be restored.
To me that meant there was going to come deep healing. The wounds that had been driving my sinful behavior were going to be revealed and healed. Not only was He going to provide the green grass and the still waters … my daily needs for living. He was going to go deeper and get into the wounds deep in me. Wounds from my childhood. Lies that I had listen to and believed about myself.
I didn’t know what a “restored soul” looked like but it sounded wonderful. And over the past 7 years He has done that. Plus, I believe He wants to do that for you.
I so much want to encourage you to begin praying that for yourself. Thank the Lord that He is your shepherd. Thank Him for his provisions for you. I don’t care if you feel like you have hardly anything at all … thank Him for what you do have. Then daily start praying that He would restore your soul. Deep healing awaits.