Are you addicted to sex? I am guessing that if you are reading this your answer would be a definite “YES!” Or, at least you recognize that you have a problem that is starting to damage your life and your relationships with those around you.
Sex is a horrible addiction. It will often involve porn and has probably become a quick fix that you turn to when you need to escape the pain or problems in your life. Thanks to the internet almost anyone in the world has immediate access to anything from lingerie catalogs to hard-core pornography and even live people ready to engage you in virtual sex.
I will spare you the long list of statistics that tell us what this multiple billion-dollar industry is doing to our world, our culture, our families and ourselves. Men tend to struggle more than women as far as percentages but that gap is closing and more women are joining the ranks of sex addicts.
This activity we call sex was originally created by God to be a gift for husbands and wives to share with one another only and is an important part of a good and healthy marriage. Virginity used to be a gift a man and a woman would give each other on their wedding night which would be the consummation of their vows to one another. Something to be cherished for a lifetime of growing deeper and more intimately connected.
Oh my, how archaic that sounds in light of the world which screams out through our hormones that we must get all we can as often as we can. It is the instant fix that does not fix anything. It dehumanizes people into sexual toys and causes one to only focus on getting what they want and then disposing of the victim like the wrapper of a quickly eaten Snickers bar.
All that porn and meaningless sex can give you is an addictive distraction for a few moments as you have another orgasm and sink a millimeter deeper into your addiction. After the pleasure subsides, shame and guilt rush in and the one tempting you is now mocking you. Evil masquerading as someone who will satisfy your intense longings, quickly becomes the mocker of your soul and the one heaping condemnation all over you and laughing at you as you lie there defeated once again.
Whether you have been addicted to sex and porn for a few years or a lifetime I want to tell you something important. You do not have to remain in this addiction. If you are a follower of Jesus, indwelled by the Holy Spirit, and eternally and unconditionally loved by God the Father then everything that God needs to do is already in place for you to experience freedom. You can walk out of this addiction and into a life of sexual purity and holiness.
There is healing for you which is never found in isolation. We have an enemy in this world who is described as a roaring lion prowling around seeking whom he may devour. He is as Jesus said, the father of lies and when he is lying he is speaking his native language. And he has been lying to you for years if not decades.
Also at work against us are two other factors. We live in a world that offers us a Hometown Buffet of temptations and we have a sin-nature within us who has grown obese on these sweet and fatty carbohydrates and ignoring the salad bar and lean protein. Instead of receiving what God offers us we are like the dog who returns to his vomit which is the display in the buffet that is the most congested. There it lies in its stainless steel container with a large ladle for easy access and large helpings.
For over twelve and a half years I have been learning about sexual addiction and walking out of my own recovery. In the coming days, I am going to be writing down exactly what I have found to help me grow in my recovery and lead you to the place where you will be able to say that God has healed you of your sexual addiction.
Healing is possible because our God can do anything. However, healing is also very complicated because the issue of sexual addiction and the road one must travel has multiple twists and turns. Every person’s recovery is unique and is as complicated as a 10,000-piece puzzle without a picture on the box.
I hope you will stick with me as these emails will become my book on how Christians who are truly followers of Christ can be healed from their sexual brokenness. Remembering what Paul wrote in Philippians 1:6;
“For I am confident of this very thing,
that He who began a good work in you
will perfect it
until the day of Christ Jesus.“