Dealing with Double-Mindedness ~ blog
To some degree, I believe every Christian deals with double-mindedness in some areas. When it comes to us who struggle with sexual brokenness, we know this issue far too well. There are times when we truly want to experience holiness in our Christian life and yet at other times, we feel such a strong pull to sexual sin.
We know that sexual purity is God’s will for our lives. It specifically says this in 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5;
“For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God…”
However, for all of us we have given in to sexual temptation for so long and in so many ways this really is the main struggle of our Christian lives. Years if not decades of acting out sexually has hard-wired our brains to the point that when we feel the stress and difficulties of life it is the easiest solution to escape whatever struggle in which we find ourselves.
For almost all of us, this pattern began to develop before we became teenagers. I was not a believer until I was 19 so for me, it just seemed the normal things to do. Porn was available in our home via magazines and over the years I am positive I did not read any of the articles. I was there to feed my lusts, have an orgasm, and move on.
My oh my how things have changed. Porn is omnipresent and you can find anything and everything you should not be looking at. CBS News reported;
“In two national surveys, investigators found that between 4% and 8% of boys reported having sex before they were 13. That number varied greatly depending on where the boys lived. In San Francisco, just 5% of boys said they had sex before 13, but in Memphis, that number jumped to 25%.”
With the growing numbers of teenage boys and girls learning to use sexual pleasure as an escape from their problems, we can only imagine how this will impact these people in the coming years.
For the majority of Christian this is an issue of having developed an addiction to sex and not being able to deal with double-mindedness. On the one hand, we know that sexual sin is never satisfied and is pulling us further away from God’s well and yet on the other hand we know we need to be developing sexual purity if any marriage or intimate relationship is going to survive.
James writes in James 1:6-8;
“…for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.”
So, if we are doubleminded relative to sexual sin then all our pleas to God for deliverance will not be answered. Sure, in the moment of repentance and sorrow we can cry out for God to heal us but if at the same time we have not taken any steps to get rid of the porn stored on our computer then we are double-minded and that prayer is a waste of time.
I have been in recovery from my own sexual addiction for 13 years and 8+ months. I have learned that I need daily strength from the Lord that comes from His Spirit and me walking in the Spirit with the full armor of God on. I need strong accountability with men who will ask me the tough questions. I need to be open and honest about any slips I have had flirting with temptation. I have to be single-minded that I do not want to give in to sexual temptation.
This is why Paul writes in Ephesians 5:3;
“But among you, there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.”
Not even a hint … that is very strong.
Job says in Job 31:1-3;
“I made a covenant with my eyes
not to look lustfully at a young woman.
For what is our lot from God above,
our heritage from the Almighty on high?
Is it not ruin for the wicked,
disaster for those who do wrong?”
Double-mindedness is dangerous ground. Yet I remember well those days in which I flipped back and forth from a resolute verbal commitment to purity and falling back into sexual sin not too long after.
I want to help you with this because I know there is an answer. It will take work on our part but the greatness of being single-minded when it comes to sexual purity will pay benefits for the rest of your life.
More tomorrow …