Killing the Roots of Sexual Brokenness ~ blog
How many times have you restarted your efforts on recovering from sexual brokenness? A hundred times? A thousand times? Potentially it has been after every time you have committed another sexual sin.
Why does this sin continue when we can clearly see that it has the potential to ruin our lives? We know that sexual immorality is not God’s will for our lives and is an addictive behavior with short-term pleasure and long-term pain. Once addicted it can at times seem impossible to stop even though we realize it is getting worse and not better.
That is why I continued downward in my levels of sexual sin to where it cost me my career as a pastor and almost killed my marriage and the relationships with my 4 children. For a man who had every reason in the world to stop … I did not. Even though I was repenting in private before God my isolation, shame, and fear kept me there against my will.
I know the pain of that place and I know many of you are experiencing those same realities in your life. When you are thinking rationally and not stressed out or angry you do not want to continue down this road of self-destruction, but it seems like no matter what you do and how many times you do a 180, turn around, and want to return to God you eventually fall back into it again and again and again and again.
One problem we all face is that we are trying to deal with the fruit of our problem and not the root of it. We try to eliminate all the ways sexual sin can be accessed but are masters of finding ways around our boundaries. Go ahead and buy a dumb phone, tear out your internet equipment and get rid of your provider and you will only make sexual sin more difficult to achieve … but achieving it we surely will.
So, how about we change our tactics? What if instead of trying to eliminate the fruit of sexual sin we attack the roots? What if we go to the heart of the matter, find the real problem and work on putting it to death? There will be no fruit if there is no root.
And while we are killing the roots of our sexual sin, what if we are also doing what it takes to deepen our spiritual roots and experience the transformational work of the Holy Spirit? What if we are putting to death the things that are killing us and daily begin strengthening our relationship with the Lord of Life who wants for us an abundant life?
So, this week we are going to be looking at the roots of sexual sin. And let’s get to the heart of the matter and that is the reality that sexual sin has become our god. It is our god of Escape … our idol of Immorality. It has become what we turn to so we can momentarily get some relief from the pain in our lives yet are only deepening the wound and making things worse.
Sex becomes an idol in our lives when we turn to it instead of turning to God. We have gone there so many times our brains are now hardwired for speedy relief of pain with another escape to fantasy land. It is the Alka-Seltzer we use for relief but has become our Alcatraz. It seems to be offering us escape when it is only taking us further down into the dungeon of sexual addiction.
Instead of coming to the throne of grace where Jesus our Lord is sitting to receive help from Him in our time of need, we go back for another worship session at the altar of immorality. Instead of finding the escape God has promised us so that we can endure every temptation … we go to the place of intense pleasure gratifying all the evil desires of our flesh yet, wounding us further.
One thing I have learned is that when I indulge myself in sinful sexual pleasure it is a place where demons reside. They are welcoming me and telling me what a great thing it is for them to see me back. They assure us we are in incognito mode and nothing will be discovered. I should relax and take my time because they have so many more exciting things to show me.
It is for this reason that if we are going to attack the roots of sexual sin we must learn to deal with the demonic influences in our lives. We must demolish the idols of sexual sin and allow them no place in our lives.
The good news is that God has provided us with everything we need for life and godliness. We have been given four things that we must use to put to death the roots of sexual sin and the demonic forces influencing us.
First – we are sealed with the Holy Spirit … and He is infinitely more powerful than any demon and even infinitely more powerful than satan himself. Our body is His temple and He is there to help us and deliver us from all demonic powers.
Second – we have been given the full armor of God … which we must utilize daily if we are going to stand strong against the powers of darkness. Our battle is not against flesh and blood but against demonic forces. Without the full armor of God, we are facing a powerful and dangerous enemy in our underwear.
Third – we have been given an offensive weapon to use against demonic influence and that is the Word of God … the Bible. It is a double-edged sword able to pierce our thoughts and minds and tells us the truth when we are facing lies. Yet we tend to ignore learning it, memorizing it, and meditating on it. It is in the closet with our old set of golf clubs gathering dust.
Fourth – we have been given community … and yet out of fear and shame we choose to isolate. We keep our sexual sin hidden allowing it to defeat us year after year. Remain in isolation and you will continue to lose this battle and be destroyed by the lion seeking whom he may devour. A lone sheep is a dead sheep.
Tomorrow … how to deal with the demonic.