I know we learn early in life that big boys don’t cry. Who the hell thought of that? Probably some mother or father at the end of their rope after being with a child all day who was not feeling good and was going around the house crying about every little thing.
You make bacon and eggs and he wanted Fruit Loops. He could find only 1 of his favorite socks. He thought it was still Sunday and now has to get ready to go back to school. You made him tuna fish instead of the PB&J he was hoping for. One of our own kids would throw himself on the floor wailing because he was not getting his way. We simply told him to go to his room and stay on his bed until he stopped having his little fit. He is now 38 and seems to be a fine, mature, and responsible adult with 3 kids of his own.
Have you ever thought about what crying or weeping is all about? I think it is an outward expression of an internal problem. Something has happened and you are overwhelmed, and your body is reacting the way it was designed by God to respond. It is an outward sign to others that there is something wrong with you either on the inside or the outside.
Jesus shows us His humanity when we read the shortest verse in the Bible – John 11:35;
We are not sure why Jesus wept. He could have been there to save his life before Lazarus died but He stayed away for 3 days…on purpose. He knew the Father was going to use Him to raise Laz from the dead so that was not the issue. I think there were two other reasons for Jesus weeping. He was somewhat confronted by Mary and Martha and they attacked Him with their words instead of showing faith that Jesus could fix even this problem.
In verse 38 we read again that Jesus was “deeply moved within.” I believe that there were certain times when Jesus felt the emotions of sadness. Like when He saw his people being mistreated and were like sheep without a shepherd.
We have this tendency to think of Jesus like He was superman and not a real man just like us. He was God in the flesh…but He was a human being just like you and me. His life was not easy but hard. 700 years before He came to earth we are told by the Prophet Isaiah 53:3-5;
“He was despised and rejected by men,
a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief
and as one from whom men hide their faces
he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
Surely, he has borne our griefs
and carried our sorrows;
yet we esteemed him stricken,
smitten by God, and afflicted.
But he was pierced for our transgressions;
he was crushed for our iniquities;
upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace,
and with his wounds we are healed.”
We have this tendency of seeing God as an Angry Father who has turned against us because of our sexual sin. We imagine Jesus and the Spirit are greatly disappointed in us because of our long list of broken promises. However, we would be wrong in believing those lies. Jesus knows what you are feeling and He understands it because He has experienced pain, rejection, physical abuse, verbal abuse, and people hating Him so much as to want Him killed.
When we are lying in the garbage of our sexual addiction…again…again…and again, His response is not anger but compassion. Also, the Holy Spirit who dwells inside our body is grieved when we sin. And the reason He is grieved is that we are hurting ourselves. His grief is for the pain we are doing to our lives…our body.
How many times a day do you go out into the garage, pick up a hammer, and smash the nail on your baby finger? I am guessing none. Why because you do not like pain. Maybe you should do it just once…to see how much it hurts, and I would guarantee that you would not do it again.
So, let me ask you…when you sin sexually are you helping yourself or hurting yourself? Sure, there is the momentary pleasure which might be felt for a short period of time…then you orgasm and go on your way. However, the pain comes later. Later when someone finds out the truth about your secret sin. When you don’t delete your history well enough or your wife finds you texts to another woman.
I know two men who are hurting right now because they are being divorced by their wives. Their marriage is over. Their kids deeply wounded. All that because it was not till death do us part…because their vows were broken, and they did not keep themselves only for one another.
It is in those times of deepest pain caused by the sinful choices we have made that we need to see Jesus, our Lord, and Savior as someone understanding what we are feeling. He is not waiting to clobber us because of our sin. He will discipline us if we do not repent and confess. We are warned that whatever we sow so shall we reap.
Listen, Jesus loves us far more than we can ever imagine and there is absolutely nothing that can separate us from the Love of God. He feels pain for us because we are hurting ourselves. We have created a space of isolation we can run to, get a sexual fix, and hide from others.