Absolute Essentials to Your Recovery from Porn ~ blog

Sometimes knowing what is most important in life is easy. If you are in the middle of a desert the most essential thing would be water. If you are at the bottom of a lake sure…you have an abundance of water, but you need air. So, if we were to have a list of the most absolute essentials that we need to stay alive it would be air, water, and food. That’s pretty simple to figure out right???

What are the most essential things you need to learn and actually be doing to progress in your recovery from your sexual brokenness? I have been working on my recovery for 5,646 days…or 15 and a half years. I figured that since porn and sex brought such painful devastation to my wife and family, destroyed my ministry as a Senior Pastor, and cost me my career that I would “…not go gently into that good night.” (Dylan Thomas)

So, I have been challenged by the men who have been helped by my 180 Recovery Program. I have been hammering it out like a blacksmith beating a sheet of steel into something that can be used as a model for others to be poured into…or to blaze a path on which others can follow to find freedom from this highly addictive behavior.

I started doing this in 2012 teaching nearly 100 men on Monday nights at the Vineyard Columbus church. We began meeting on February 9, 2009. I had been studying and learning everything I could about this destructive addiction for 7 years feeling driven by the Spirit of God to teach men desperate for answers who were not only trying to save their lives but to save their marriages and families where applicable.

The result of two years of writing and teaching on this subject became the 180 Recovery Program, a series of 25 videos, and a workbook that is biblical, Christ-centered, and very practical…plus it works. However, when others have boiled their “steps” down to 12, then to have 25 steps seems like a lot.

So, I have been challenged by the 180 Vision Team to boil it all down to the most essential things someone needs to not only KNOW but even more importantly DO if they are going to experience growing freedom from their addiction to porn and sex.

Do you get that? These are not the things you need to be thinking about doing or contemplating on occasion to help you with the secret sideshow you have going on down in your basement. These are the things you will need to do…and continue to do for the rest of your life if you want to become unentangled from this sin that has so easily entangled you and has either destroyed your life or is in the process of so doing.

The hard part of doing this is that sexual addiction is a multifaceted problem. Yes, it is every man’s battle but with different folks, there are different strokes (pun intended). Some have become addicted just out of the pure pleasure sex has given them. The act of becoming aroused and reaching an orgasm floods the brain with chemicals as effective as heroin in giving us a hit of extreme pleasure.

For many, it is much more than that. It is our pain and our stress that is impacting our feelings and we have learned that viewing porn brings an almost instant relief that can go on for hours with a delicious finale at the end before coming back to our senses and feeling like crap the rest of the day.

So, I am going to put these ideas together for you in the coming days of my emails/podcasts. And before we launch this journey, which we will do tomorrow, you need to know somethings that will be absolutely essential if you are going to end up where you want to be…free from sexual sin. And…yes…that is possible.

To some of you, that sounds impossible. You feel you are at the end of your rope and someone has untied the knot you were hoping to hold onto and covered the last 6 feet with Vaseline. You have hit rock bottom and if you are married your wife might have heard the splat and asked you if you are ok…and you probably lied…like me.

Some of you have not hit rock bottom yet and still think you can find your own way out. Good luck with that and come back when you are so exhausted from trying to recovery alone and finally realize that trying harder is not going to work.

Where does one need to be so that they begin a work of recovery that actually works? You need to be done trying the next quick fix, the newest seminar, latest book, and webinar. There is no quick fix that will fix you from sexual temptation so that you do not have to deal with it any longer. It is…

“The Battle You Cannot Win…

But Cannot Afford to Lose” 

And it is one you need to be prepared to fight every single day.  Why??? Because if you believe the Bible is true and is the Word of God, as I do, we can be assured that every day we live in this life of ours we will always have 2 active enemies and one horrible reality.

We are clearly told in Ephesians 6 that we are not in a battle with flesh and blood. There is another battle that is very real and very powerful. Paul puts it this way…

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”

All of us face a very powerful and organized enemy who simply wants to take you out and porn is his favorite and most effective way to do that. Do you think you do not need help against this enemy? You do and the help must come from both within you and from others around you.

 

The second enemy we have is our flesh or our sinful nature. This part of us where we have evil desires that we have sharpened our entire lives. They have a hunger that we have created ourselves. They have the power to shut down our brains, blocking out what we know we should do and so enraging our sexual desires that we do exactly what we should not do…over and over again.

So, understand here is your reality.

We all have a powerful external enemy who is fully committed to destroying our lives.

We have a very powerful internal enemy, our flesh or sin nature, whose appetite for sexual sin is insatiable. It will never have enough. It will always want more.

And oh…by the way we are living behind enemy lines. We live in this world that is fallen and in so many ways is evil. We now have the ability to be looking at any kind of porn we want to see in a matter of seconds. And as long as shame and fear are keeping us in bondage things will only become worse.

So, before we begin this journey, I want you to know what you are up against. This battle is every man’s battle. Our enemies will not give back the ground we have given them easily. However, tomorrow we will look at why we should be optimistic because no matter how powerful our enemies are…absolutely nothing is impossible with God and He has given us everything we need to live a life of godliness in this perverted sewer in which we find ourselves.

Have Hope…help is on the way.

1 thought on “Absolute Essentials to Your Recovery from Porn ~ blog”

  1. Hi John, thanks for your daily devotions. I have found them really encouraging and helpful in my own battle w pornography.
    Kevin, Aberdeen, Scotland

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *