Absolute Essentials – Seeing the Big Picture ~ blog
Over the last two days, I have been painting for you the Big Picture of what we all need to realize about our struggle with porn and sexual sin. You might be having one of two reactions.
Discouragement – That sucks because you were already discouraged from this battle that you cannot win but cannot afford to lose. You might be thinking…
“Really John, you are telling me that I am in a battle with the internal enemy of my flesh, an external enemy of demonic forces, and I am living behind enemy lines???”
Yup…that pretty much sums it up. So many Christians are living in denial, holding on to their blessed assurance, and flocking to “feel good” Christian Churches. Let’s pretend that everything is fine when 60% of all the Christian men and 25% of all Christian women are addicted to using porn. Living lives of quiet desperation in shame fearing their secret sin will be discovered.
And when it finally is exposed it can be an absolute train wreck. Oddly enough the offending spouse feels some relief that the truth is out…like a huge weight is lifted off of them. The problem is it lands squarely on the spouse crushing them and ultimately the children when the marriage ends and sometimes torrents of anger come out of the mouths of both of them.
Jesus Himself told us that satan is the father of lies and that he comes to steal, kill, and destroy. And when he can get any Christian man to begin to go to porn and sex to escape the problems of his life, satan will use that to turn spouses against each other as their vows of abstaining from all others as long as you both shall live become a bad joke.
And singles who do not have the option of having a spouse with whom there can be sexual intimacy can easily find a substitute either online or in person. Why save yourself till marriage when so many are looking for “friends with benefits.”
Encouragement – Ok…so this is every man’s battle and a growing battle for women as well. However, this is no “breaking news flash” to God. Notice what Peter writes…
“His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.”
I refuse to believe and hope you do as well, that our battle is more than we can handle. God has not left us in this garbage dump to fend for ourselves. He has given us everything we need for a godly life. And as I wrote yesterday that begins with God placing His Holy Spirit in our lives the moment we accepted Christ to be our Savior. The Spirit of God who dwelled in Jesus now also dwells in you.
And He is there, in us, with a number of purposes but I would say first and foremost is to empower us to become Christ-like. He is there to transform us from the people we were, fallen in sin, addicted to porn, and living a selfish and rebellious life…into becoming a person more and more like Jesus.
The Spirit is also there to bring into our lives His fruit. Here are the results of learning how to be filled with the Spirit every day and then walking in the Spirit throughout your day. You will become more LOVING to those around you who need your love. You will have JOY in your life. You will be able to maintain your cool and have PEACE in troubling times. You do not freak out when others around you are losing hope. You become more PATIENT with those around you and patient with yourself.
You will begin to experience giving KINDNESS to those you love and even to strangers. There develops within you a sense of GOODNESS where it is easy to see what the right choices are that you need to make.
You also become a more FAITHFUL person. You can be counted on and this rebuilds trust in your marriage and relationships. And instead of being someone whom others do not want to be around because of your explosive anger, you begin to show GENTLENESS towards others especially your wife, family members, and friends.
And lastly…SELF-CONTROL!!! OMG, how critical would that be??? Being filled with and walking in the Spirit daily…I said DAILY…and by that I mean every day as the Spirit of God begins to transform you one by-product or fruit will be the ability for you to say no to sexual sin.
Self-control is like installing new brake pads in your brain. Over time you have worn them down to nothing. Your brakes are shot because even though the frontal lobes of your brain are saying NO! NO! NO! Your flesh is saying YES! YES! YES! And once again over the cliff, you go.
As I have experienced these fruits of the Spirit…the more I experience them the more of them I want. The Spirit is transforming me, and I have noticed that when temptation used to be a fire-breathing dragon in my path destroying my desires to stay pure…he is now more like a gnat that has no power over me.
My desires have been changed by the Spirit and I can now honestly say that I desire purity and the fruits of the Spirit far more than I desire sexual sin. In fact, I do not even want sexual sin because I know what it does and brings into my life and marriage…and even more importantly I cherish what the Spirit is doing as I am being filled with Him and walk with Him every day.
So how do we become filled and walk in the Spirit…tomorrow!