I was exposed to pornography at the age of 7. I would sneak and watch HBO after dark when my mother fell asleep.
The older I became the more my curiosity grew on sex and porn. My family was not a faith–based household and masturbation and porn was just a thing kids did when they were discovering their sexuality.
My cousins and brothers influenced me to not only watch porn but also look at women only as a sexual object. This influence followed me through my childhood into my marriage. At the time I got married it was based off of sex and cultural perspectives. Pornography numbed my emotions. I began blocking out my wife feeling completely and only focused on my own desires.
Through the grace of God and the relationship He had with my grandmother. My heart had finally opened to listen to her advice of finding a church home and giving my life to Christ.
The first church I was introduced to was Real Life Church and sermon they were preaching was Marriage and Sex. They talked about the ramification of porn within a marriage, it irritated my soul because I was still deep into pornography at the time.
I wasn’t able to handle the truth, so I never went back to the church, but I didn’t give up on finding my faith. Through my continuation of growing in my faith, I was finally convicted to give up porn.
I tried on my own and made progress, but I found myself falling over and over again. My pastor preached a sermon of allowing God to help you through building relationships. In the process of creating boundaries for my addiction, I visited covenant eyes and found a link to 180 Ministries on the page.
I instantly thought of my pastor’s sermon and sought out ways to join the group. It was the best decision of my life, It helped me to find a band of brothers who support each other in overcoming this addiction and living a better life. As my group always says and “a lone sheep is a dead sheep”